A vote for me is a vote for dipshit businesses everywhere

Monday, August 16th, 2010

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Let’s get the self-aggrandizing plea for attention out of the way:

Please vote for my SxSW panel entitled “A Bootstrapped Geek Sifts Through the Bullshit.”

It answers questions like “How do I get the courage to just start when I know so little about what it’s really like at a startup?” and “How do I balance the utility of learning from others with wanting to go my own, unique way?”

Plus it’s ironic; I’m giving advice about how to take advice. You know, like finding a black fly in your Chardonnay. (White flies are harder to see and therefore not ironic, you see.)

OK, now ..read more

The Pattern-Seeking Fallacy

Monday, June 14th, 2010

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What do these have in common?

“This pitcher has retired 5 of the last 7 batters.” “We tried 10 AdWord variants and combination D is the clear winner.” “The Bible Code predicted the Sept 11 attacks 5,000 years ago.” “We sliced our Google Analytics data every which way, and these 4 patterns emerged.”

All are examples of a common fallacy that I’m dubbing the “Pattern-Seeker.”

You probably laugh at Nostradamus, yet it’s likely you’re committing the same error with you own data.

basketball player

Patterns in Chaos

It’s commonly said that basketball players are “streaky” — they get on a roll hitting 3-pointers (have a “hot hand”) or develop a funk where they can’t seem to land ..read more

Telling the 800-lb Gorilla to Shove it up his Ass

Monday, May 31st, 2010

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Every founder frets about competition from a big company, me included.

We scoff at their inability to innovate and for prioritizing shareholders over customers, but still we quiver in fear.

stock-dance

Dozens of people on Answers.OnStartups ask about it so I know I’m not alone. It always goes like this:

I’m just a two-person operation with no budget. What if a huge company with a hundred software developers and a million dollars in marketing budget decides to copy my idea?

Answer: You’re dead! Give up! No small company has ever survived competition with a large one!

Oh wait, that’s not true. But poking fun doesn’t help; maybe this article will.

First, take a deep breath and remember ..read more

"Authentic" is dead

Monday, May 3rd, 2010

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It’s time to retire the following phrases. They should no longer be used, ever, in any context except derisive mocking:

gapingvoid-yak-yak-yak

Fast and easy Putting customers first The Holy Grail of The leading provider of Legendary customer support

Also eschew these words, as devoid of meaning as a yogi’s mantra and as useless as a simile that doesn’t contribute new information:

gapingvoid-welcome-nobody-cares

Authentic Solution Genuine Powerful Secure Simple Innovative Insight Disruptive

These words have been corrupted by those who claim to honor their meaning but do not act accordingly.

When a company claims to “put customers first” but then uses “Level 1 support” as a shield to prevent customers from intruding on ..read more

Maybe not so much with the "optimization"

Monday, April 5th, 2010

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miniviewer-sidebarIn the quest for optimization, A/B tests, metrics, and funnels, we’re in danger of losing the fun and value of creative work.

When we demand overwhelming customer outcry before committing to the slightest product change, we’re in danger of losing the value of creating a cool feature that takes too much effort but people just love.

When we do the minimum necessary to get the job done, we’re efficient but not thrilling. We’re “lean” but we’re not stirring hearts. We’re effective but not playful.

I’m as excited as everyone else about Lean principles gaining traction, and sure most companies are erring on the side of too little ..read more